Third, the way to convince him would be to tell him to bring a marriage proposal to your family. Jordan ( ) on Twitter What he's doing for now is that he's trying to make you emotionally attached to him, once this happens he can do what he wants with you. And that is the test, to see if you would comply when placed in a time when others do not. to a man for a genuine reason, or vice versa, then that may be achieved This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. 1 The reports that indicate that it is haraam to be alone with a non-mahram woman even if she is with her fianc include the report narrated by al-Bukhaari (3006) and Muslim (1341) from Ibn Abbaas (may Allaah be pleased with him) who heard the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) say: No man should be alone with a woman.. A few later and were still good friends. I came across this site, so I thought to ask here. Love is not haram ,but what u do of that love is important ,how do u keep that love is important weather in a halal or haram state ,said by mufti menk, You are all wrong: all boys dont look at girls to have (it) with them Im a muslim girl following islam and i talk to boys everyday but that doesnt mean We are going to have sex like. Mutah. Muslim (2159) narrated that Jareer ibn Abd-Allaah (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: I asked the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) about an accidental look and he commanded me to avert my gaze. In Islam the awrah is to be completely covered except when in front of the spouse, very young children, slaves and in case of medical emergencies. It was narrated from al-Rabee ibn Sabrah al-Juhani that his father told him that he was with the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) who said, O people, I used to allow you to engage in mutah marriages, but now Allaah has forbidden that until the Day of Resurrection, so whoever has any wives in a mutah marriage, he should let her go and do not take anything of the (money) you have given them.. It's old-fashioned to impose on people to adhere to sex segregation - and honestly, the concept causes more issues anyway. Keep your modesty akhi and fear Allah. Your iphone 15 is still good but now it feels as if it's not as good. No doubt, that is a great misconception. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Analytics". Its not over til the Trumpet is Blown Sin and Repentance in Islam, The Sin of Fornication and Adultery Part 1, The Sin of Adultery and Fornication Part 2, The Sin of Adultery and Fornication Part 3. The prophet clearly forbade it, it existed before Islam and at one point it was permitted just like alcohol was but the ruling is its forbidden in the life time of the prophet as the hadiths below show. This isnt your culture or your religion. Doesn't everyone do the same, in the end of the day? Is there a way to speak with vermin (spiders specifically)? You're not going to get used or get pregnant if you just don't have sexsodon't bloody have sex. But opting out of some of these cookies may affect your browsing experience. If a crystal has alternating layers of different atoms, will it display different properties depending on which layer is exposed? i think you wanna say that even talking to a boy is haram or even seeing a guy is HARAM?????? In her spare time, Aisha enjoys her family, photography, nature, martial arts classes, Islamic studies, volunteering/charity work, as well as working on her book and spoken word projects. Log in, Join our e-mail list for regular site news and updates, All Rights Reserved for Islam Q&A 1997-2023, Questions cannot be asked through this form. helpmeiamdy 6 mo. I am curious too. As others explained, there is no dating in Islam, not touching, kissing or any of it. Yes it is permissible for a wife to go anywhere she wants under the security of her husband. I could mention many more, but it's not really a debate forum. Therefore mutah is not for married men, only in very certain and un-likely situations like distance, disability of the wife etc. He wanted to keep me at peace, to have a smooth pregnancy. Are you suggesting that the Holy Prophet (SAW) permitted prostitution and the sahabas practiced it? Similarly, there are people who marry someone and then a week later divorce them. What's your plan if Allah holds you accountable for not following Allah's command? what a reasonable thing to do. He (the Holy Prophet) forbade us to do so. Remember to always pray and think about Allah and refer to the Quran. May I reveal my identity as an author during peer review? My Parents Dont Understand Me, What Should I Do? I just wanted to ask this question I've had for a long timeso umm.. You don't need him, marry only the halaal way. Other than this, there are things that are commands and others that people have figured out is the desire of Allah but not a command. Mar 18, 2020 at 9:45. How do I tell my parents I want to marry someone else? When it doesnt fit your view of what modern world should be. That's old-fashioned and doesn't realistically work in Western / modern society. They said, "We do not water until the shepherds dispatch [their flocks]; and our father is an old man." (Quran 28:23) "So he (Musa) watered [their flocks] for them" "Then one of the two women came to him walking with shyness. LOSING YOUR VIRGINITY BEFORE MARRIAGE FOR A GUY IS NOT WORTH IT, THREAD VERY CAREFULLY! If a woman needs to speak Allaah wants to make the Muslims However, Im 90% sure he likes her too. Just the same as if someone tells me to jump out of a 45 story building without explaining to me what the benefits of doing so would be. We live in a time - at least in Western / modern society - where women contribute financially to their household just as much, or even more than, their menAND they still do all of the housework on top of it. That is purer for them. In particular it prevents what wahabis have been practicing for years, which is to marry someone in order to have sex with them, and then divorce them weeks or months later and sometimes even days later! r/islam is the place to discuss any topics related to Islam & Muslims. This website uses cookies to improve your experience while you navigate through the website. We should follow the ways of the country or province in which we stay in do not interrupt their lifestyle because they are doing it "wrong." We use cookies on our website to give you the most relevant experience by remembering your preferences and repeat visits. If the desired mutah wife is christian or jewish then it MUST be done with her consent. Ive hung out with her a couple times outside of school, never just the two of us. Is it haraam to fall in love with someone of your own gender because i happen to know a girl who i really like. I was seeing someone who used this on me but I then found out after 3 yrs later he was in several other mutas with girls. What are the shar'i limits on that?. Temporary Marriage easilyin the top 5 most controversial Islamic topics. Calling yourselves brother and sister is a lie, since the reality is that you are NOT related. You must obey, there is no choice. And makes me feel like we could be losing Lindita. What has gotten into our men.. There is a process where you have to think about God because there is a contract, and dowry and every what ifis answered (i.e., if you get pregnant, then what, etc.). It sounds like you just need friends. Sheikh Ahmad Kutty is a Senior Lecturer and an Islamic Scholar at the Islamic Institute of Toronto, Ontario, Canada. It's illegal to take a game bird, game mammal, or game fish and knowingly permit an edible portion to go to waste. Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid, You can ask your question on the website via this link: https://islamqa.info/en/ask, Password should contain small, capital letter and at least 8 characters long, Log in According to you i have to sit in dark room not even go out cuz it might creates the relations with my classmates or other. Advertisement cookies are used to provide visitors with relevant ads and marketing campaigns. You can still hints him that you like him so he would notice you (*cough* *cough* senpai! It is HARAAM there is no b/f, g/f relationship in ISLAM. Do you even fit into one of those categories? Mutah is alright to do and also if you do want to be fully married with him in the future. But there are so many other things I could list: - Women needing their male guardian's permission to leave the house, travel, work and whatnot. This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. I just need to not be taken to hell forever, and I prioritize that over western heritage. to temptation? Simple as that. I dont believe my religion encourages it. During these dates, the unmarried couple is usually somewhat physically intimate. We also use third-party cookies that help us analyze and understand how you use this website. May Allah subhanahu wata'ala guide you to what is best for you in Dunya and Akhirah. Were the sahabs pathetic when they practiced it? So with that in mind, I pray that I can speak about this topic with justice and bring about the understanding of His wisdom.). You can hangout with your wife and best friend anytime you want. still no luck). Winner of GBBO Nadiya Hussain to Release Debut Fiction Novel. Well issue here is that he is not being honest with his first wife and not fully honest with you either. Is it haram to hang out with the opposite gender just as friends? Let me start off by saying that I never really felt any sort of attraction towards her and although I have no way of knowing for sure, I dont think she ever felt anything for me because weve always liked other people. and, 2. By clicking Accept all cookies, you agree Stack Exchange can store cookies on your device and disclose information in accordance with our Cookie Policy. The attorney general maintains a list under Assembly Bill 1887, a 2016 law that targets discrimination against gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people. Muslims are not allowed to participate in proms as they are generally practiced in North America, for such gatherings invariably involve unlawful mingling and mixing of boys and girls. The cookies is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Necessary". Dont let him push you around at all ! Its not like the dating system that the average American has. Many other girls have gone down this path which led to loss, and they regretted it, but that came when it was too late, at a time when regret was to no avail. Mutah is only for the truly desperate and those who are not able to get sex. As someone who was born, raised and lives in England, what I'm about to say may not sit well with other Muslims but I personally only think SOME aspects of Islam are compatible with modern day Western society and if I followed it 100% then I doubt it get along much further in life. California adds AZ, IN, LA, UT to travel ban over LGBT laws | The Since you are starting to like her, this could lead to something haram. It's like having an iPhone 15 only to then meet an iPhone 16 in two months. Since "people of the book" includes Christians and Jews, your original sentence would imply that it is wrong for a Jewish man to marry a Jewish woman. We meet very rarely.but not alone. Muslim women are honoured and to be used as sex or being flaky is not needed. In the last few years of high school, she struggled with anxiety and depression so I always tried my very best to help her in any way possible (she did go to her girl friends but she said it was nice to have a guys perspective on things too). He himself denies to meet and want to come to my home directly to ask my hand from my parents.. Zaera, I don't see anything wrong with proceeding toward marriage. halal haram - Is shaking hand with non-Muslims prohibited in Islam In any case, if you need further advice please register and submit your question as a separate post instead of commenting here. In fact, I know it isn't. I believe the morals of Islam don't changebut the formalities and mechanics do. That's just unfair in my opinion and makes life harder. Do not listen to him, change your number CUT ALL CONTACT WITH HIM. Ever one is mature here, and can take better decision for own, If any one has justified to belie about Muta,, so we can not do any thing. Many people feel as you do that laws should change for the times. And another one by our Prophet Muhammad s.a.w had once said, "Be kind for wherever kindness becomes part of something, it beautifies it, Wherever it is taken from something it leaves it tarnished.". May Allaah keep us and you safe from all evil. 6 The evidence that it is haraam to speak softly to men is the verse in which Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): O wives of the Prophet! Yes it is haram to get closer to a girl. Ruling on shaking hands with the opposite sex This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. Maybe if I get advice from a young lady maybe it will make more sense to me. Stack Exchange network consists of 182 Q&A communities including Stack Overflow, the largest, most trusted online community for developers to learn, share their knowledge, and build their careers. Allah says in the Quran to not take secret lovers. Marriage is a massive dealit's your life we're talking about. Site design / logo 2023 Stack Exchange Inc; user contributions licensed under CC BY-SA. Talk to them as if they are your friends because, at this age, they are supposed to be your friends as well as your parents. Dont even call yourself a sayed or a religious figure. Also, as we all know, many people (non-muslim) have bf and gf and most probably surround you. Is there no other way? Note: It is makruh in the event that there is nothing haram in the gathering, otherwise this intermingling will become haram. Yes it is permissible for a wife to go anywhere she wants under the security of her husband. How should our family approach this? By the women and men in my life - family, friends, colleaguesand again, in my culture, hugs have absolutely no sexual connotations to them. Particularly women, that often are targets for sexual harassment. Did he even pay or give you the required dowry? I don't consider dating without being physical haram so you're not being pgysical you're good. Some people, sadly, are very weak and ruled by their carnal urgesthese people would probably benefit more from either only seeing their partner in groups and in public, or from sticking to the traditional ways of having their marriage arranged for them (if possible). Even if I did believe in arranged marriages (which I don't - but if I did), I would have no one in my life to actually arrange my marriage for me. This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. Ask yourself, if your feelings for him are truly Platonic, then how would you feel if he fell in love with another woman? But when I say we were boyfriend and girlfriend, all we really did was hang out together, talk about our visions for the future and all in all get to know each other better to learn if we could be right for one another. I have a boyfriend and now regretting it. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Analytics". These prohibitions are known from the evidence of the Quraan and Sunnah, and no exceptions are made for one who wants to get married or even for one who is actually proposing marriage, because a fianc is still a non-mahram and a stranger to the woman until the marriage contract is done. I've only met him once,but done no kissing or anything. Feeling is not haram. Lo! I'm not concerned with which one of us is better, it doesn't matter anyway. How to marry her, a complicated situation. 101 - Bbc What I Learned Hanging Out With Nigerian Email Scammers will be the third one present. If this woman wants to hear about Islam What we call the "universe" is just a test. Does your bestfriend know your going out with her ex ? Nowhere in the Quran does it say it is OK to have bf/gf. Just carry on with your life and move forward. Permanent marriage is the best thing. And if they do, they only think of how weak or strong the handshake was - because weak handshakes are a big no no :P. Anywaymy point iswe have to be realistic and acknowledge that not all Muslims can get by without getting into pre-marital relationships - and if no workable and realistic solutions for these Muslims are found, I think it's insane to deny them the right to find a spouse in whatever way it's possible for them to find a spouse. I have been recently highly agitated by what I have read in Islamic sources about friendship between Muslims and non-Muslims. step by step Browse other questions tagged, Like any library, Islam Stack Exchange offers great information, but, Start here for a quick overview of the site, Detailed answers to any questions you might have, Discuss the workings and policies of this site. near zina/dating) is immoral, and an evil way." The idea of being with her in a romantic relationship doesnt seem right to me, even if she didnt like the other guy. Now he wants $5B to fight overdoses, Up to $9,000 a month and work from home? A look at the history of the courthouse in Jason Aldean's music video If you think friendship with women is zina then you need . First of all boyfriend/girlfriend relationships are totally haraam. If Allah wanted gays he would have made Adam and Steve not Adam and Eve, You think that girls only talk to boys for their physical needs or sexual satisfaction what thee shit is this ahhhhhh. I am a muslim and completely condemn mutah because it goes against the basic teachings of Islam in regards to modesty, lineage and ties of kinship. So please, can anyone tell me if having arelationship before marriage ishalal or haram? The bakht camel is a type of camel that has a long neck. all doors that may lead to evil. What of children produced in a mutah? Do Muslims not date all the time and commit Zina? How can I be a better Muslim? How will you explain on the day of judgement that you didn't do what you were asked because you didn't agree with it? Cracking decent jokes is not haram within itself but it generally signifies a more relaxed relationship. I would suggest you end the marriage. 2 The evidence that indicates that it is haraam for a man to look at a woman includes the verse in which Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): Tell the believing men to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things), and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts).